My Dog Has Nicer Toys Than Me

The squeaky hedgehog that cost fourteen dollars. The indestructible ball that cost twenty-two. The puzzle feeder that took you longer to figure out than it took him. The plush fox he has never once let you wash because he sleeps with it every night and you are not a monster.

You have a phone and a streaming subscription.

He has a toy box. It is organized by category. There is a rotation system. You read about it, it made sense, and you implemented it. Toys he hasn't seen in two weeks come back out as new. He lights up every time. You feel like a genius every time. The system works and you are committed to it.

There is also a dedicated section of the cart — every cart, every store, every website — where you check for new toys before you check for anything you actually came for. This is automatic. You stopped questioning it some time ago.

He destroys some of them in under an hour. You read the reviews, you knew it was possible, you bought it anyway because the enrichment value was worth it and you stand by that completely.

His toy box runneth over. That's not excessive. That's love with an enrichment budget.

This funny dog mom shirt is for the dog owner who has curated, rotated, and lovingly maintained a toy collection that a small child would genuinely envy — and who considers every single purchase completely justified. Your dog plays well. You made sure of it.

A perfect gift for dog moms, dog dads, and anyone who has ever added to cart for their dog before adding to cart for themselves and felt absolutely no conflict about that decision whatsoever.

• Comfort Colors 1717 garment-dyed tee in Moss
• Relaxed, boxy fit — soft from the first wear
• Original illustrated design, created exclusively for My Máximo Life
• Printed in the USA — made when you order it

Boxy, relaxed silhouette by design. Size down for a more fitted look.

Part of the Máximo Love collection — for the people who love their dogs a completely reasonable and totally proportionate amount.

EU representative: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY

Product information: Comfort Colors® 1717, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999/44/EC

Warnings, Hazard: Made in Honduras

Care instructions: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Do not bleach, Tumble dry: low heat, Iron, steam or dry: low heat, Do not dryclean